PARROT JUNGLE

As promised in the previous post, here are some pictures from our trip to Parrot Jungle, preceded by a picture of Bill with Boris and Natasha. From the pictures I will hope that you agree that he would have enjoyed Parrot Jungle.

My music share for today is a song from Voices Of The Red Heart.






















This is Sally (above). She was the most friendly of all of the birds. It is behind her perch where I placed Bill's hair.













Bullai Bullai (Green Parrot)

IN MEMORIAM (2007)

Cindy and I held our own little memorial for Bill yesterday by visiting Parrot Jungle Island, in Miami. I couldn't think of a more fitting way to remember my brother than by playing with the birds he loved so much. (Pictures will appear in the next post.)

When Bill died last year, I wanted a part of him to bury in a close-by place that I could visit. So, when my parents and my sister went to L.A. to close Bill's apartment, my mom sent me a hair brush so that I could have some of his hair to bury. I held the hair until yesterday. I believe that my brother would have enjoyed Parrot Jungle and so his hair has been scattered behind the second perch just off the Island Crossing section of the park (see picture).



On this, the day that we begin our second year without Bill, I hope you are all doing well. If you would, please say a prayer for my brother today.

During my last trip to the cemetery, I had a few moments alone in the car near the wall where Bill's ashes are interred. I rolled down the window closest to him and played "Dead Flowers" by the Rolling Stones. So, I share that song with you today, hoping that you will listen to it and reflect on the times you spent with Bill.


Dead Flowers

HAPPY ST. PADDY'S DAY

I'm not sure what, if any, meaning St. Patrick's Day had to Bill, but I'm pretty confident that at least during his New York days he celebrated the same way the rest of the city did.

I don't recall whether I told Bill what St. Patrick meant to me, and since you are part of what keeps Bill alive, I thought I would share that with you. When I was diagnosed with Hairy Cell Leukemia a few years back, I really thought I was going to die. And, while I had returned to fully practicing my Catholicism a few years before, this event strengthened my faith. As I would pray, I would pray to St. Jude to help me return to health. But, it was to St. Patrick, to whom I prayer so that I would not fear death. I still pray to him so that I would be prepared whenever that time comes.

Since I mentioned that Bill may have celebrated this day in New York, I am posting a photo where he looks to be in his 20s, and therefore, still living in the city. Since this day (to me) always meant a day of immigrant celebration (not just Irish), my musical share is a song that Bruce Springsteen describes as a "immigrant" song.


American Land

PAUL ANKA - "PFFFF"

I can almost hear the "Pfff" sound that Bill would have made if I could have told him what my wife and I are doing tonight. I won tickets to see Paul Anka in concert at the Sinatra Theater in Sunrise, FL. Most likely he would have had a story about his youth and an Anka song. Ultimately, he probably would have agreed that Anka has had an impressive career as a songwriter. (Among his songwriting credits is a song that both Frank Sinatra and Elvis Presley had hits with - "My Way".)

Here's a photo of Bill from a time (1966-67) when Paul Anka's "Put Your Head On My Shoulder", "Diana", and "Puppy Love" were still in the rotation on non-Odies radio stations. The shared song for today is a Nirvana cover from Anka's "Rock Swings" CD.


Smells Like Teen Spirit

IDES OF MARCH

You know, as I started to begin this post, I thought about the historical meaning of the ides of march. For some reason, the death of Caesar called to mind Jim Morrison, which made my mind draw a comparison of Morrison's death to Bill's death. I read once that the remaining members of The Doors and many of Morrison's friends found it hard to believe he was dead because they never saw the body. I never realized how someone could feel that way, until my family experienced the same thing with Bill. So often, when the phone rings, my mind (or maybe my heart) wants to believe it could be him...

My musical share today is from "Train". I was looking through some pictures of Bill when I first heard this song. One of the photos appeared (at least to me) to be a picture of Bill from the days he drove a cab. So, I thought it would be appropriate to post this picture with this song.



Cab

RANDOM POST 20070314

For my musical share, I've chosen a song by Ben Lee. If we were still exchanging cassettes, this would have been one of those times when Bill would have said, "Give me the 'Best Of' from the CD because I've already got too much shit."

The photo is obviously a picture of Bill and Boris (from an unknown date).



Catch My Disease

STORIES OF BILL

On Sunday, my stepdaughter Crystal received the Sacrament of Confirmation. Afterward, we had a gathering at our home. As the guys sat around the kitchen table exchanging stories, for the time I was able to share a few stories about Bill without breaking down. I was actually able to smile and laugh, which is a welcome change since I often found myself laughing when I spoke to, or spent time with, my brother. I'm sure there will be some tough days as the anniversary of his death approaches, but at least for one afternoon I was able to celebrate his life with laughter.

Since today is Tuesday, I will share two songs with you (Two-For-Tuesday). Neither of the songs is new, but I know Bill like both of them. Both are by Lou Reed - the second was recorded in Los Angeles in 2003. I'm not sure if Bill attended the show, but I do remember when we went to see Lou at the Universal Amphitheater back in 1984. "New Sensations" was out and Bill played the LP over and over. Needless to say, he thoroughly enjoyed the show. I'm sure most of you will remember the framed print of Lou that hung in Bill's home for years.

The photo below is from the mid-sixties, that me and Bill in front and our sister Suzie in the background. The photo is currently the desktop on my work PC.



Dirty Blvd.

Sweet Jane (Live In Los Angeles, 2003)

RANDOM POST 20070312

I'm really not sure of what Bill would have thought of Death Cab For Cutie, although I do know that I would have sent him a copy of the CD. You can listen to the first single from the "Plans" CD, which was actually released before Bill died. Also, here's a picture of Bill from our parents' backyard in 2000.


Soul Meets Body

MEMORIES OF JOSHUA TREE

Today marks the 20th Anniversary of the release of U2's "Joshua Tree". Bill and I would have definitely spoken about the anniversary. It was a CD that we both enjoyed immensely. I had become a U2 fan with the previous two releases. This was the first U2 release that captured Bill's attention. I remember visiting him during this period and remember that he listened to the CD frequently. I also remember telling him about the two shows I saw at the Meadowlands (a lame performance in the first one - one of my top fives in the second).

Here's a picture of Bill in the dessert (Joshua Tree maybe?) and a cut from the Joshua Tree CD.



Trip Through Your Wires


MEET THE BEATLES - I MEAN - MEET THE SMITHEREENS

In case you missed it, a few weeks ago we celebrated the 43 anniversary of the release of "Meet The Beatles". To mark the event, The Smithereens released "Meet The Smithereens", which is a complete remake of the Beatles' release. Here's a sample from that release:

I Want To Hold Your Hand

RANDOM POST 20070308

After posting yesterday, I decided that I will make an entry daily - even if it is just to share a photo and a song.

So, here's a photo of Bill from what would appear to be a prom or some other formal event. (Oddly enough, after I selected this photo of Bill when he was around 18 years old, I realized that I was posting it on my stepdaughter's 18th Birthday - HAPPY BIRTHDAY, TIFFANY!!!)

The song is from Willie Nile's "Streets Of New York" CD.


Cell Phones Ringing (In The Pockets Of The Dead)

LISTEN UP

Thanks for visiting. It's been a while since the last post, but it was time well spent. I've been spending a lot of time with Bill's things and I've learned a lot more about my brother. I am also starting to deal with the fact that there is so much about him that I might never know - but that all depends on those of you who do know more...

As you may or may not know, my brother and I had a music exchange going for what was probably close to twenty years. Early on, we exchanged cassettes and later I would send him copies of my latest CDs. It seems that we always exchanged information about music whenever we spoke. Those conversations are something I miss a great deal.

So, starting with this entry and continuing with every entry going forward, I have decided to attach a link to a song that I would have liked to share with Bill. The song link comes courtesy of Napster. You must have a high speed connection, allow Napster pop-ups (for the player), and you must register (free) to listen (once registered you can listen (free) to every song I post - or any of the over 2 million songs available - up to three times). Simply click on the link and following the instructions. When you listen to your first song, you will be asked to login. You can avoid doing this on subsequent listening sessions by marking the "Remember me" box.

This song has been around for the better part of a year. When I first heard it, my initial thought was that I have to ask Bill if he had heard it; then I realized that I couldn't. Since he was a White Stripes fan, it might have been him telling me about the song. Anyway, have a listen to Jack White's other band, The Raconteurs.

Steady, As She Goes

FEBRUARY UPDATE

I apologize for the lack of posts - it's been a very busy 6 or 7 weeks for me and the situation will continue until at least the middle of this month. In the meantime, here is what I can share:

My dad and I travelled to Los Angeles in mid-December to retrieve the remainder of Bill's things. (A picture of us at the end of our 2,800 mile drive.) The good news is that all of the Optimax equipment is in a safe location on the east coast. This allows me to catalog the equipment and to try to get it placed in a museum. Unfortunately, the volume of the 3-D and Optimax information is daunting. I probably have 18 months to 2 years of work ahead of me.

Also included in the items we brought back were thousands of slides. As with the pictures I had to work with earlier, the slides will be scanned and published in a second photo book. Finally, there are files of personal writings and Optimax clippings/business documents. In the future, Bill's writings will appear as posts.

Although all of the cataloging is time consuming it is worthwhile since I learn little things about my brother every time I have the opportunity to work on these projects. I hope you are all well and I hope that as we near the first anniversary of Bill's death you will be more willing to share your thoughts and memories.

55

Today would have been Bill's 55th birthday. My parents and I had the pleasure of spending his last birthday with him. It had easily been over 30 years since that had happened, so it holds a special memory for us. I just know that if we continue to celebrate our birthdays after we're gone, Bill is in the midst of one of the greatest parties ever. Happy Birthday, Bill! We wish you were here with us, but we know you're in a better place.

CHEERS

Just a quick note to say I hope you all have had a wonderful holiday season so far. Obviously, it hasn't been the same without Bill. I was listening to some Christmas music today and I remember that Bill wasn't very fond of the genre. But then "Christmas Wrapping" by the Waitresses came on. I honestly believe that song was the only carol Bill ever really liked.

My family sends its best to all of you this Christmas, Hanukkah, etc. Season and we hope you have a happy and healthy New Year.

As Bill would say - CHEERS!

BILL BUKOWSKI: Son, Brother, Uncle, Friend

I am pleased to announced that the book that I had been working on, BILL BUKOWSKI: Son, Brother, Uncle, Friend, is now available from MyPublisher.



The book is loaded with photos of Bill and also contains some text content. You can view the book by following this link:

Bill Book

When prompted, enter the following password:

721966

(Please note: the password contains 6 characters. My testing has discovered that a copy and paste may yield a 7 character password and therefore an invalid password message.)

If you have any questions concerning the book, or if you would like to purchase a copy, please direct inquiries to MyPublisher. My only involvement in this project is the book layout and compiling the content. I have no affiliation to MyPublisher.

Hope you enjoy the pictures.

COUSIN CHERYL REMEMBERS BILL

(I found this memory of Bill in the inbox this afternoon. Thanks, Cheryl.)

I can remember the very first time I met Phil's big brother Bill - they are my cousings (2nd cousins, or once-removed or something like that) and I was probably in 8th or 9th grade, maybe 10th (I remember I had recently got the Rolling Stones "Sticky Fingers" album, so maybe it was the early 80s). Anyway, we had gone to New York to visit for Thanksgiving with the family and Bill (Billy then) lived in Manhattan. Maybe he was in school then, I'm not sure but I remember going with Phil to visit Bill at a Film Center in NY and then to his apartment. I remember thinking, "WOW! HOW COOL!"

Since we lived relatively far away, we didn't often get to see Bill and the family but from time to time, occasion to occasion, I did get to see Bill a few times. On one occasion, when I was living in Brooklyn many years later, I remember that Bill ALWAYS made a point to come over and talk to me; even if it was only a short conversation. I believe that family was important to him. It didn't seem to matter how often you called, or if you kept in touch because even though I didn't get to know him well, and our families didn't get together often, when he did see you, he made it a point to say "hi and how's it going." You were "family" and it seemed to him, anyone who was family was no stranger. What's more he seemed genuinely interested in what you had to say. And he always sent a Christmas card (and a funny one at that!) And, I think that was "WAY COOL" too and it says something about the kind of person Bill was.

Here's to you Bill!
Cheers!
Cousin Cheryl (Zsigalov)

THE DUCK LIGHTING

As many of you know, Bill loved Ducks. One of the things we both recalled from our youth was the Duck building that we passed on trips to Montauk. I found this news item that I know I would have shared with him, so I share it with you.

Long Island Celebrates Holiday Season With 'Duck-Lighting' Ceremony

FLANDERS, N.Y. (AP) -- Who needs Rockefeller Center when you have the Big Duck?

It was 1931 when construction workers at Rockefeller Center put up a modest Christmas tree to begin what would become one of New York City's greatest traditions. That same year, a Long Island farmer decided to build a giant duck-shaped shop where he could sell fresh ducks and eggs by the side of the road.

Seventy-five years later, as millions watch Christina Aguilera, Sting and Bette Midler perform at the Rockefeller Center tree-lighting, a much smaller group will gather 75 miles to the east to light the Big Duck.

A volunteer fire department, a middle-school choir and local baseball team mascot named "Quacker Jack'' will light up the 20-foot-tall duck. Santa Claus will arrive atop a fire truck and youngsters will sing carols.

The duck will be decorated with a huge wreath around its neck and holiday garland and lights around its base.

The Big Duck is on the National Register of Historic Places.

In the 1950s and '60s, Long Island boasted about 70 duck farms, raising $6.5 million birds annually and contributing two-thirds of the nation's duck output.

Today, Long Island is down to three farms that raise about two million ducks annually - about ten percent of the nation's output.

THANKSGIVING VISIT

My wife and I drove up to Delaware to surprise the family this Thanksgiving. On Friday, my dad, Cindy and I drove to The National Shrine of Our Lady of Czestochowa to visit Bill's grave. Here are some pictures from our visit.





The interior and exterior of the Shrine Chapel where Bill's funeral mass was said.








Bill's final resting place and the mausoleum where his remains are interred. Anyone that ever received a Holiday card from Bill knows that he enjoyed the festiveness of the season. That's why my mom and sister thought that hanging the ornament would be appropriate.



My dad, Cindy and I during our visit.

THANKSGIVING

It seems strange to be thinking about Thanksgiving this year. In the year that Bill died, it almost hard to think of things to be thankful for but here goes my Top 10 list :

1. I'm thankful that I got to spend New Year's Eve with Bill.
2. I'm thankful that I got to spend Bill's last birthday with him.
3. I'm thankful that my new family got to meet Bill.
4. I'm thankful that, when the end came, Bill did not suffer long.
5. I'm thankful for Bill's friends who selflessly helped my family in Los Angeles.
6. I'm thankful for everyone who attended Bill's funeral and made it a day of special remembrances.
7. While I missed my brother at my wedding, I am thankful for my new family and the joy they have brought me during some difficult times this year.
8. I'm thankful for all of you who have sent an email and have stayed in touch.
9. I'm thankful for all of the photos that Bill left which have helped me get through some tough days.
10. Finally, I think that I can safely speak for my entire family when I say that we are thankful for Mike Groob who has helped in many ways, with his actions, his memories and his kind words.

BILL IN YAHOO TIME CAPSULE

I have made an entry remembering Bill the the Yahoo Time Capsule project. The project will be closed in the near future and reopened again in 2020.





Click here to view the entry.

BRILL REMEMBERS BILL

I recently received an email from Bill's friend Bob Brill. Bob has been in China since January and did not find out about Bill's death until a few weeks later. Here is an excerpt from his email:

Bill is someone I truly respected and asked advice from regularly.

He was truly an amazing person - granted I was not around for the "good years" but I was always amazed at his talent and his wit. I have never laughed so hard as when I was laughing with Bill. Working and being frineds with Bill really added to my life. He is someone that I will never forget and would regret if I never befriended. A true friend. I actually broke down and cried when I found out.

Bob also paid tribute to Bill's memory on his blog:

Guilao Bob In China

Thanks Bob!

NEW EMAIL ADDRESS

You may have noticed that the email address for this blog has changed. While you will still be able to use the previous address for some time:

bukowskibigbukowski@yahoo.com

the new and simpler address is now in service....

big.bukowski@yahoo.com

CORONER'S REPORT

The coroner's report came in this past week and I opened it with mixed emotions: relief that we would finally know how Bill died, but also apprehension, since I might not really want to know the details.

To my family, the most important part of the report is where the coroner indicates that "the trauma present DID NOT contribute to his demise." He continues that it "was sustained as he collapsed." Based on this finding it seems that Bill died before he collapsed and thankfully did not suffer for an extended period of time.

Ultimately, Bill died of something called "Left Ventricular Hypertrophy." I will not even begin to try to explain what that is since I am still trying to fully grasp the meaning of the condition. Click here for a Google search result for more information.

I would like to thank everyone one of you who has stayed in touch during the last several months while we waited for these findings and I hope that you will continue to do so. It has been wonderful to get to know Bill from different perspectives.

Finally, I found this picture of Bill on the same day I received the report and it seems fitting to me that it be included in this post.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN

I don't recall too much about Bill and Halloween. The only time I remember spending at least part of the holiday with him was when I was living in L.A. in 1984; I remember being with him at the Halloween Parade in Hollywood. If you have any memories, I'd love to hear them. Also, I'm finishing work on my photo book of Bill and would love to include any words you might like to add. For now, here's Bill on an unknown Halloween.

OCTOBER UPDATE

Last week I discovered that the L.A. Coroner closed Bill's case on July 3rd. I was a little stunned when they told me since I had spoken to them in late June and they had stated that they did not expect to close the case for at least another six months.

In any case, a determination of death has been made. I have requested the autopsy report and a death certificate and expect to have these within the next month. I will post information when I receive the documents.

As stated in a previous post, I am working on a photo book of pictures of Bill. If you are interested in a copy, drop me an email and I will provide the information.

I will begin posting photos again in the next few weeks.

SIX MONTHS

Today marks six months since Bill's passing. I hope you are all well. I wanted to put up a post today to mark this date, but I wasn't exactly sure what I would say. Fortunately, when I was speaking to my dad today he said something that struck me. In the words he spoke you could hear a fond memory and a hope for the future. He said, "it was six months ago today since I last spoke to him." Although he didn't continue, in his voice you could hear his hope that it wasn't last time ever and I'm pretty sure it won't be.

Rest peacefully Bill.



Here's a photo of Bill and our mom, Louise.

IN REMEMBRANCE

Bill lived in the shadows of the Twin Towers during their construction. I seem to remember that he had a love-hate relationship with the buildings. However, after the events of 9-11 he was drawn to visit ground zero. Therefore, I thought it was appropriate to make this post since I'm sure that if he were with us today, Bill would have been thinking of the events of September 11, 2001.

SEPTEMBER RECESS

Now that my anniversary celebration of "Comin' At Ya!" is complete, I'm going to take a month off from the blog. I've had a lot of craziness in my life since March and now I need a little time for myself. If anything happens that I think needs to be shared, I will post an entry - otherwise I will return in October. By the time I begin to post again I hope to be able to report that I have found a home for the Optimax III lens system in a museum.

As always, if you have anything you want to post, simply drop me an email.



Bill and I on December 30, 2005, in my home in Delray Beach, Florida.

FINAL THOUGHTS ON AUGUST 1981

August 1981 - It must have been an unbelievably exciting time for Bill. And although I can't be certain, I'm sure Bill supplemented it with some crazy activities. At the time, it probably seemed like the end of one era and the beginning of a brand new adventure. And, to a certain extent, it was.



It seems that it wasn't too long after the release of "Comin' At Ya!" that Bill was headed west to California. The fact that he went west was probably inevitable; That he stayed there as long as he did was a surprise, since he was true New Yorker at heart.

Unfortunately, the 1980s 3-D craze was short-lived. I'm not sure of when the plug was pulled, but I do know that when I moved to L.A. in 1984, Optimax III was no longer a viable operation. But, before its demise, there were two more significant 3-D projects for Bill - "The Man Who Wasn't There" and an Aerosmith concert film.



Once the 3-D projects had ended I never heard Bill say why it thought the 3-D craze fizzled out. But, I think the article that was posted yesterday pretty much summed it all up. It seems that everyone in the 3-D community was more interested in bad mouthing the competition. Had they worked harder a developing a niche, 3-D would probably be a standard today. As we know, hindsight is 20-20, and 3-D awaits its next period of reemergence.

I've had this month to contemplate whether or not Bill was better off for having been involved in "Comin' At Ya!," and I can't say one way or another. Certainly, it was a highlight of his career, but it was also the event that pointed his life west. In retrospect, while he liked Los Angeles, I'm not sure it was the best place for him to be. The one thing that I do know for sure is if he stayed in New York, I would have had the opportunity to get to know him - and his world - a little better. And, I would have loved that!!!